Friday update: coffee recommendations, fanfic woes, and exciting news in old fandoms

So today I came across this, in which Stephen Colbert crashes the party at Jon Stewart's last show to give Jon a thank you speech and then goes off the prompter and I'm pretty sure Jon almost cried. And I'm like. This was one of my oldest RPF ships and I am really really remembering why. I hope everybody sees this and writes truckloads of fic. I need it again.

Speaking of fic, I've been trying to psych myself up to write some for Generation Kill. I've been half wanting to for ages, but I can't get past how real the show feels, and it's weird to write for this in a way it never was for me, even for bandom or winter olympics ice skaters or random actors or all the RPF fandoms I've been in. It's hard for me to reconcile the fact that even in the show, the characters are real people who really went through all that war shit. I've almost finished the real Nate Fick's One Bullet Away (which is a damn good book, btw, in the tradition of war autobiographies or whatever. He's a good writer. Classics major, right? Why does this happen to me).

So for a while I figured the show was all the story I needed. Couldn't stop myself from reading the fic anyway, though, so now I've got an idea for some Brad-centric character study type stuff and it's slowly taking shape. I also kind of want to podfic And he who dies fighting has increase, by chantefable, if I can get permission. I also really want to make a Brad/Nate-focused (but overall GK) fanvid to King and Lionheart. I can't believe no one's done it already! Seriously. Listen to it. Look at the lyrics.

taking over this town they should worry
but problems aside I think I taught you well
howling ghosts they reappear
in mountains that are stacked with fear
but you're a king and I'm a lionheart
though far away, though far away, though far away
we're still the same, we're still the same, we're still the same

and as the world comes to an end
I'll be here to hold your hand
'cause you're my king and I'm your lionheart

Seriously!! Augh. I have ideas for like all the scenes and where they should go. The imagery of "king and lionheart" is exactly how I characterize the Brad/Nate relationship, like ancient ideas of a knight and his lord and shit. The atmosphere is perfect. I just...don't know how to vid. Oops.

Anyway. I've been at my parents' house for the last few months, getting my shit together and reveling in being done with college and doing very little at all, and simultaneously doing a whole lot. I stopped running for a while after the semester ended in order to make absolutely sure my legs are fully healed from any shin splints or almost-fractures; my legs are way too fucking fragile. But I think I finally figured out how to run properly so that's good! In the meantime I took up going to pilates at the local YMCA. And let me just say, pilates is so great, you guys. It's so much fun and it's doing such good things to my body. It fixes my particular posture problems (too much...curve in the back?) like magic. The teacher is awesome. She constantly offers modifications and variations for everything, so the wide range of people who come to the class (like all ages and skill levels) can do what works for them. It's surprisingly hard, but in a really satisfying way.

I also went to visit family in India for about three weeks. My great-grandmother is really not doing well, health-wise, and she lives with my grandma, who's old enough herself that she really shouldn't be taking care of her mom all by herself. She's like seventy-eight or something and constantly busy. But I think my parents and I were able to help a bit, just by being there and taking some work off her hands and increasing morale? I hope. It was good to see my cousins again, and go street shopping, and just generally take in how much India feels like a different world. I'm not super fucking short there! I'm 4'10" and average! It's amazing.

I also highly highly recommend Madras coffee, if you can ever get it. It is so damn good. The best coffee I've ever tasted. It has a really full flavor and it's sweeter than most American coffee. I think it's because they put chicory in it.

And I've finished the last half of Lost and have very conflicted, passionate feelings about Benjamin Linus.

And...I can't think of anything else but I'm sure there will be more! Hope you all are doing well. And enjoy that Stephen Colbert video. By "enjoy" I might mean "watch it and weep with me," but I'm maintaining some plausible deniability.
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happy Friday!

I think Fridays might end up being my posting days, just because I have no classes (except PE) and nothing due the next day. HALLELUJAH.

I'm going back home this weekend for spring break, and it's gonna be a much-needed week of...probably doing a lot of things, actually, but at least no new assignments. And importantly, on Monday I'm going to MEPS to do the physical examination for the Air Force! I am so excited, you guys. Hopefully I pass even though I'm fucking tiny and barely make the minimum height/weight requirements. Hopefully they won't be like "sorry you're an inch too short to join," because I will be so upset. And probably promise to do lots of stretches or some shit, because surely that will make me taller? Right? I can hope.

But if everything goes well, I will be in the pipeline, and able to take the tests to qualify for the jobs I really want to do, and my recruiter will be nice and try to get me those jobs. And then I will just have the last few classes of college, and then some time to hang out with [personal profile] jabbergrey and enjoy civilian life or something, and then I will learn all kinds of cool sciency stuff, and have a real job, and be able to do cool shit and lift heavy things and know state secrets. Maybe not the last bit. And if everything really goes according to plan I'll probably end up somewhere in Colorado, which is close enough to visit friends or family every month!

Fingers crossed.
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a generation kill crisis

So now that the Long Deadline of "get the magazine to the printers" has passed, I'm finally back in the swing of things, "things" meaning watching TV, mostly. I have watched a few more episodes of Generation Kill. And this is my situation, now: this show is obviously super fucking serious, and at the same time, I can't help desperately wanting fic where Lt. Nate Fick tops.

Like, seriously. I understand he's got the delicate-faced prettyboy looks (by god do I understand) but we gotta look past appearances and into personality, here. Lt. Fick would make such a good top. And it would be so hot. Why won't the internet indulge me in these things? :(
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So I live in dry, arid, elevated New Mexico, and have for the past few years. It snows here sometimes. I think that's cool as shit, because before this I lived in California, where it snowed once, for about 20 minutes, in ten years, and then immediately evaporated. (Before that I lived in the East, so little me really missed snow when we left.)

But not since I moved here have I seen this much snow! It's apparently record-breaking and not gonna stop. I know this is mild compared to the Northeast but I'm excited, you guys, look at this:

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in the end, it is all love

Today [personal profile] jabbergrey directed me to this. And so today I interrupt all of your Wednesday nights to say: OH GOD GO READ THAT. It's about My Chemical Romance and it's about love, you guys, I don't know how to talk right now without sounding like a giant dweeb but that is what I am and MCR taught me to embrace sincerity. This band. I care so much, they mean so much to me, and I can go a long time without breaking down and shouting about it but reading that was like going to a thousand shows. Fucking Aly from One Week One Band, you guys. Thanks for that.

So: if you need something cathartic and anguished and powerful, if you need the world MCR created to reawaken in your heart, or something I don't have the words for right now, if you need to listen to a band's entire discography and cry and feel like everything is a story that continues today and matters and is bound together by love or something dweeby and camp and real, well. Aly's got your back. Or music's got your back. Or something like that.
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So, uh, it's Friday and I've been very busy this past week and lots of stuff has happened but right now I am too overwhelmed by the TV I just watched. Help? I feel like The X-Files has reached some kind of cultural saturation point where it's one of those things people are supposed to know the whole plot to already, but I don't, and I'm really enjoying uncovering it bit by bit, but--what the hell just happened? MULDER NO. I AM CRYING AT THE SCREEN IN ANGUISH.

The season five intro is a two-parter which means if I want to know what happened, I need to watch two more episodes, and I don't know if I can deal with that. Do I do that right now? Do I make pasta? Do I finish an essay? I don't think I can handle this. HELLO INTERNET MORE LATER <3
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hi, internet, it's Friday.

I'm having a good Friday! It's been really busy this past week—third week of my senior semester in college, \o/! I'm taking a lot of higher-level classes, but so far I've actually managed to stay on top of the work. I work on a literary magazine, and I have an editing workshop this weekend, in addition to a 40-minute presentation next week, and a group lit review project, oh god. But it's all good, because this morning I've been swallowed by music feelings!

I have a lot of love in my heart today, for the person I'm dating (I'll call her A, she's awesome, we've been together almost two years and all I want to do is, like, travel the country and bash out amateur guitar melodies for her stories), and for music in general, because last night I watched The Black Parade is Dead! again with A (for the first time in ages—god, I honestly don't know if I've watched it since I was seventeen and got it from the library and went to my very first show, in the virtual emotional rollercoaster of my living room).

In other music news, I've recently gotten very into the Weakerthans! It seems like every song of theirs has this rough, open, tiny-spark-of-potential-in-the-void kind of feeling to it, and I love it. Fucking hell.

Also, I am sore as shit, because I've started taking this PE class called Military Fitness for the second semester, and as you can imagine, it's brutal. But it's brutal in a strangely enjoyable, satisfying way! I took it last semester because I went on this really long train of thought where I discovered that you could do space-related work in the military without having a science degree (which I don't), and I have desperately wanted to do space things since I was a wee child, okay. So even though I would never ever have even thought of it before, I decided to get in gear for the possibility of Air Force things, which mostly entailed getting a series of shin splints, running shoes, an ingrown toenail, and aches and pains no one my age should have. But also, I (who have never even so much as step foot in a basketball game) managed to pick up full-grown human beings and run more than I ever have in my life and do, like, so many pushups the dudes were impressed. There's a certain camaraderie in everyone getting put through the wringer alike, so even the athletes are falling snot-on-the-grass down and high-fiving the new kids. ...It's probably my masochism talking.

Anyway! So that's happening, and I also recently discovered there's something called astrobiology, which, why did no one in my life ever tell me about this? It's literally the scientific field that studies the possibility of alien life. Like, that exists and it's real and even NASA funds it. What the hell? Here I thought my dreams were relegated to television and no, I could do it. For real. (They also study respectable things like "how do human bodies react to the stresses of space," which is cool in itself, but. They study what kind of life could live on Mars. They figure out what kind of signals we'd need to look for to detect aliens. I am not even fucking kidding.)

So, yeah, if I want to actually do that I'd have to take a few more years of classes in biology and calculus and get some research experience and shit, because mostly astrobiology happens at the graduate level, but. It's out there and I'm thinking about it.

And that's an update in the life! Now I'm gonna go hum in the shower or something. Does anyone have experience with song composition? I'm thinking about it a lot right now and my experience consists of "I started out humming Scarborough Fair and it turned into this unidentifiable mass, help," but I suppose maybe even the pros do that sometimes. This entry was originally posted at Comment wherever you want!

wherein I have an "I want to believe" poster on my wall

You guys, I miss LJ/DW fandom. This is the conclusion I have come to after returning to pinboard for fic recs when I exhausted Archive of Our Own (how is that possible?) and getting sucked into a time vortex of people's fic posts from 2009. Yeah. That was great.

I'm feeling maybe writing some and posting fic old-style for fandoms like the X-Files (although: oh my god, did anyone see, they are considering a reboot and Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny are BOTH DOWN, help me, someone help me breathe) or, like, fuckin' Stargate or something. Or even newer stuff like Agent Carter (can anyone say "human Jarvis is a giant sub," please, or for that matter "Angie is fucking gay"?) or Homestuck, which is just begging for some dumb cosmic ship manifestos.

I've also reread a bunch of old RPF and basically I am parched for some nice comforting fandom squee. Should I post some? Should I continue to stare glassy-eyed at documents full of Mulder/Scully ideas? Does anyone have fannish thoughts they've got to share? (Does anyone know why LJ doesn't ever load anymore?) What's up in the world here? I hope everyone's doing well, and happy Monday.

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fic: the world's not waiting

and now, of course, the really interesting stuff:

here is a fic-type thing i wrote not too long ago!

this is patrick/gerard, genderswapped (maybe also sexswapped? i still haven't decided if these versions of the characters are cisgirls, so feel free to make them whatever you desire in your head!) and it's set early in both their careers, probably 2003-ish. so they're pretty young, and i've used some characterizations that i've developed in conversation with a friend—patrick is wee and dom and very polite, but nursing a potential to be quite vicious, and gerard is also wee and eager and generally less self-conscious about her desires (read: raging sub, in a dramatic kind of way). and a giant nerd.

content notes: contains bdsm elements and some implications of fantasized noncon/consent play (assumed to be consensual).

summary: patrick jerks off, at some point. 1490 words.

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hello friends

this is a "hi i'm here, it's been a while and i feel like i have changed as a person but i like myself better now and i like you guys too" post, because i would like to post fic here but it feels weird to start posting again without saying anything!

feel free to tell me about what has happened in your lives or whatever you're interested in these days, i would love to hear from you <3 and that goes for pretty much anyone i have ever talked to or follow or anything; i feel like i was always a little socially awkward and hesitant when it comes to talking to people (and to writing! but college has been good to me on both these fronts, and i feel like i've improved at least a little) and i would love to get to know you all better!